Author Archives: Tessa Heywood

Blackadder’s take on the Euro

Baldrick: “What I want to know sir, is before there was a Euro there were lots of different types of money that different people used.  And now there’s only one type of money that the foreign people use.  And what I want to know is, how did we get from one state of affairs to the other state of affairs”

Blackadder: “Baldrick.  Do you mean, how did the Euro start?”

Baldrick: “Yes sir”

Blackadder: “Well, you see Baldrick, back in the 1980’s there were many different countries all running their own finances and using different types of money.  On one side you had the major economies of France, Belgium, Holland and Germany, and on the other, the weaker nations of Spain, Greece, Ireland, Italy and Portugal.  They got together and decided that it would be much easier for everyone if they could all use the same money, have one Central Bank, and belong to one large club where everyone would be happy.  This meant that there could never be a situation whereby financial meltdown would lead to social unrest, wars and crises”.

Baldrick: “But this is sort of a crisis, isn’t it sir”.

Blackadder: “That’s right Baldrick. You see, there was only one slight flaw with the plan”.

Baldrick: “What was that then sir?”

Blackadder: “It was bollocks”.

The offside rule explained

Trying to explain the offside rule to football beginners can be difficult and frustrating. Whether it’s to a loved one or to a young child, sometimes it seems to be an impossible job. But the tedious task is no more thanks to the Royal Mint, who have produced a new 50p coin to commemorate the London 2012 Olympic and Paralympic Games.

The design – by production journalist Neil Wolfson – is available as part of the collection of 29 new coins this year which features each sport of the games. ‘Neil Wolfson designed his coin in the hope that it would encapsulate football in a simple image,’ the Royal Mint coinmakers website explains.

“As the offside rule is a perennial talking point, the image is designed to provoke discussion, which was what he was aiming for.”

Mr Wolfson added that he hoped people like the coin, saying: ‘I hope it starts conversations and people are able to [use it] to describe what the offside rule is.’

And there was me thinking that it was offside when the pepper pot is in front of the brown sauce bottle!

2011 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 3,600 times in 2011. If it were a cable car, it would take about 60 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

Interesting Fact #18326 – Busted!!!

Their brain power is at best shallow. Or so we thought. But scientists believe fish may have hidden depths.  The creatures said to have a mere three-second memory span can actually recall information for up to three months.

Scientists found that fish trained to respond to certain sounds in captivity still reacted months later when they heard them in the wild.

The finding challenges the stereotype of fish being forgetful sorts, an idea reinforced by films such as Finding Nemo, whose characters include an absent-minded fish called Dory.

According to research at Plymouth University, goldfish have a memory span of up to three months – and can even tell the time.

The fish were trained to nudge a lever to get food.  When the lever was adjusted so it would only work during one hour each day, the goldfish adapted, learning only to press the lever around the right time.

They even clustered around the lever as feeding hour approached, apparently remembering it was nearly lunchtime – or was it just because they were hungry???

Pause for thought …

“Every New Year people make resolutions to change aspects of themselves they believe are negative. A majority of people revert back to how they were before and feel like failures.

This year I challenge you to a new resolution. I challenge you to just be yourself. ”
– Aisha Elderwynv

Interesting Fact #18326

Everyone knows a few things about Goldfish.  They’re gold and they don’t live very long.  Well how much do you think your goldfish knows about You?

Not very much because their memory span is only 3 seconds!

Out with a bang – or was it a whimper?

Social network Twitter ground to a halt yesterday as it was overloaded with New Year messages. In Britain the site crashed at about 3pm and was out of action for more than an hour.

It coincided with midnight celebrations in Japan when revellers were sending a record 16,197 tweets per second.

The overload meant no one could post new messages or read existing ones. Instead, frustrated users were greeted with the error message: ‘Twitter is over capacity.’

The site returned to working order but then stopped on several other occasions, prompting speculation that it was being hit by the arrival of New Year in different parts of the world.

One user tweeted: ‘It’s amazing how three words can ruin my day! Twitter over capacity.’

Another joked: ‘Twitter’s New Year resolution needs to be I will never go over capacity.’

Conversely however, I was actually able to send texts at midnight last night that were going through straight away and responded to immediately – an unheard of event in years gone by … perhaps technology hasn’t moved quite as far ahead as it would have us believe?

Merry Christmas

I hope you have all found what you were hoping for under the tree this morning!

I would just like to take this opportunity to wish all my readers a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and lets hope that 2012 brings you joy and laughter, good health and happiness – we all deserve a bit of that!

He just wanted a decent book to read …

Not too much to ask, is it?  It was in 1935 when Allen Lane, Managing Director of Bodley Head Publishers, stood on a platform at Exeter railway station looking for something good to read on his journey back to London.  His choice was limited to popular magazines and poor-quality paperbacks – the same choice faced every day by the vast majority of readers, few of whom could afford hardbacks.  Lane’s disappointment and subsequent anger at the range of books generally available led him to found a company – and change the world!

“We believe in the existence in this country of a vast reading public for intelligent books at a low price, and staked everything on it” Sir Allen Lane, 1902-1970 founder of Penguin Books
 

The quality paperback had arrived – and not just in bookshops.  Lane was adamant that his Penguins should appear in chain stores and tobacconists, and should cost no more than a packet of cigarettes.

Reading habits (and cigarette prices) have changed since 1935, but Penguin books are still around – and hopefully will remain so for a long, long time!

The missing horses heads

My regular trips to Falkirk have been brightened in recent months by the appearance of the Kelpies at The Helix.  Just as you approach the Grangemouth junction on the M9 you were able to see these magnificent beasts standing proud at the edge of the canal.

A couple of weeks ago, however, I noticed that they were no longer there and everyone I asked in the Falkirk/Grangemouth area had no idea where they’d gone – or why they’d been moved!  If you go onto the Helix website they are still maintaining that “Although the equine sculptures won’t appear on site until the second half of 2012, we’ll be following them on every stage of their journey from final engineering design through to construction and installation.”

So what was it I was seeing before then … Scotch mist????!!!!

Today, however, the mystery has been solved – hurrah!!!  A friend tweeted that she’d seen them at Edinburgh Airport and, sure enough, there they are – apparently having been given a new temporary home. 

The Airport is currently looking at options for a sculpture on the welcome roundabout – something that will inspire those arriving in the city and give a memorable farewell for those departing.  The Kelpies give an idea of what a sculpture could look like and the impact it will have on the airport. Staff are keen to get feedback from passengers before they finalise the potential design for a permanent sculpture.

For the non-Celts reading this, a kelpie is a supernatural water horse from Celtic folklore that is believed to haunt the rivers and lochs of Scotland and Ireland  It was believed to have the strength of ten horses and the endurance of many more.

I had to find out more and so imagine my surprise when I found out that the full scale versions when they do get their permanent resting place at the Helix will stand 10 storeys high, a third taller than the Angel of the North, weigh 400 tonnes and be more than just decorative!

They will create one of the most dramatic gateways through which to enter Britain: two vast equine heads, centrepiece of this £49m eco-park at Grangemouth, are to guard the entrance to a canal link connecting the Firth of Forth with the Clyde in Glasgow.

But unlike Antony Gormley’s sculpture outside Gateshead, the Kelpies will be functional as well as aesthetic, operating the first lock on the east end of the Forth-Clyde canal near Falkirk. The heads will slowly rock forward and back to push water into the lock and raise boats into the canal.

“When you sail in from Europe or elsewhere in Britain, the first thing you will see will be these colossal horses’ heads welcoming you to Scotland,” the sculptor Andy Scott said.  “All the industries along the canal would’ve used horses, and all the farms along the canal would’ve used horses,” he said. “It’s a theme which keeps coming back. I just enjoy playing with the reinterpretation of an enduring theme.”

They will be a magnificent sight I am sure and I’m looking forward to seeing what theses beauties look like some time next year!