Monthly Archives: February 2013

Who are ya?

Mo FarahThere is a US television presenter this week who needs to go back to the drawing board and make sure she does her research before making a complete idiot of herself in front of millions of viewers.

Mo Farah, one of the most recognisable faces to have come out of the London2012 Olympics, had just won the New Orleans half marathon in a record time of 61 minutes.   Imagine his surprise to be asked by the anchor, LaTonya Norton, firstly “Haven’t you run before?” and then “This isn’t your first time?”   Surely this is on a par with asking whether the Pope is a Catholic?

Viewers were left cringing throughout the interview on local television station WDSU – she quite clearly had no idea who he was – something perhaps a quick Google search might have sorted out for her?   I thought that was what the numbers on their vests were for, to help news crews identify the individual runners.  This seems to work for most other sports.

It is unsurprising therefore that someone has taken the opportunity to update the list of anchors on WDSU’s Wikipedia page to read ‘LaTonya ‘Doesn’t know who Mo Farah is’ Norton’.

Mo Farah postboxSo Ms Norton, let me put you in the picture.  Farah secured  his place in history in London last summer, becoming the first British man to win Olympic gold in the 10,000m, and one of only five people to  also win gold in the 5,000m.   Britain’s  most successful distance runner of all time, he was awarded a CBE in the New Year’s  Honours List.

He has had two post boxes painted gold as a permanent tribute to his achievements, one  in Isleworth, where he grew up, and the other in neighbouring Teddington, in  south west London, where the athlete spent time training.   A nice touch with the one in Teddington is that it is right across the road from a Fara charity shop which has had its signwriting changed to Mo Fara as a further tribute to a local hero’s success!

Who are you, LaTonya Norton?????

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Holy Shit!

death of RobinThe end of an era!   Batman’s young partner Robin will die saving  the world in a comic book published on Wednesday, DC Comics has announced.   Both the Boy Wonder and Batman’s son, the  Damian Wayne character will meet his end in the eighth issue of the comic Batman Incorporated.

Apparently he does his job – he saves the world and dies an absolute hero.   He will inevitably be killed fighting a vicious assassin who also happens to be his brother, ‘cloned from his genetic material’.   Batman will not be there to save him.

This news reminded me of the hysterical episode of Only Fools and Horses, Heroes and Villains, where Del Boy and Rodney [David Jason and Nicholas Lyndhurst] dress up as Batman and Robin for a party with their usual calamity filled antics.  This episode was shown on Christmas Day in 1996 and attracted a record audience of  21.3 million.  If you’ve not seen it for a while, check out this clip and I’m sure you’ll agree that even 16 years on it definitely stands the test of time – an absolute classic!

Should have gone to …..

This has to be the ultimate “Should have gone to Specsavers” moment when a silver Ford Fiesta smashed into the glass window of the front of the opticians store in Sevenoaks, Kent, around lunchtime yesterday.

Specsavers

Oh the shame … this person is going to be the butt of everyone’s jokes today and, like the shop window, I bet they didn’t see that coming!!!

More haste, less speed

2013 has been an eventful year so far for actress Jennifer Lawrence … and we’re only two months in!

Hot on the heels of her recent calamity at the Screen Actors Guild Awards where she caught and ripped the bottom of her dress on a chair in her hurry to get up on stage to collect her award, she’s created headlines yet again by falling up the stairs on her way to collect her Best Actress award at last night’s Oscars!

movies-jennifer-lawrence-falls-at-oscars

She must surely be the most accident-prone actress in Hollywood!!!

Now I am sure she’s delighted with all these awards but I’m guessing she may also be mortified at these mishaps.  It’s one thing to fall over when few people are watching but it’s quite something else to do it in front of millions of TV viewers!

So Jennifer, if you’re reading this, I have a few words of advice.  Take your time, look where you’re going and definitely make sure you sack your stylist – a shorter dress would be far less hazardous for you love!!!

TGIF!

Happy Friday

Sorry … couldn’t resist!

PistoriusLike many people, I am very unsure about whether the truth will ever be known regarding the death of Reeva Steenkamp and Oscar Pistorius’ part in it.  There are more than likely months of accusations and denials to come before we find out what the Court in Pretoria will decree and what Mr Pistroius’ likely penalty [if any] will be.

The system there is quite different from our own.   Jury trials were scrapped more than 40 years ago because all-white juries were seen as unlikely to give black defendants a fair trial, a single judge is considered less susceptible to public opinion or media comments, and so the South African media is more free to report details about the Oscar Pistorius case than the media in many other countries where such reporting would be seen as prejudicial.

Needless to say, however, I was amused at reports today that on day 2 of his bail hearing the prosecution argued that Pistorius may flee if he is granted bail.    As a double amputee, why not just confiscate his prosthetic legs … he won’t get far without them ….. but leave him with them and the Bladerunner will probably disappear in a cloud of dust!

Burger Wars

In the wake of the horsemeat fiasco, it has today emerged that Burger King’s Twitter account has been hacked with the profile picture being replaced by a McDonalds logo and a message that the company had been sold to the rival hamburger chain.

Burger Wars

“We just got sold to McDonalds! Look for McDonalds in a hood near you,” one post read.   It also posted messages such as: “If I catch you at a Wendys, we’re fightin!”

The tweets stopped after a little more than an hour and meanwhile McDonalds tweeted in response to the apparent hack: “We empathize with our @BurgerKing counterparts. Rest assured, we had nothing to do with the hacking.”

It is not known who might be responsible for the breach but I do wonder if it has anything to do with the Animal Rights Movement … after all, isn’t hacking a horseriding discipline?

Witness for the prosecution

When prosecutors recently asked for an account of a crime from a “PC Peach”, they didn’t realise that Peach was the name of a police dog!  Officers were extremely irritated at the request and so they completed the form as it if had been written by the Alsatian – and signed it with a paw print!

The form was then pinned up at a West Midlands Police Station for the amusement of colleagues who are frequently at odds with the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) over their handling of cases.  Another officer then posted it on a Facebook page but quickly deleted it, though not before it was seen by colleagues in West Yorkshire police who liked it so much that they posted it on Twitter and the image has now gone viral, having been shared over 150 times.

PC Peach

The CPS, however, failed to see the funny side and officials are believed to  have complained to police that their mistake has been turned into a very public joke.

The original officer has referred himself to the internal discipline unit but sources say he is unlikely to be reprimanded, despite new guidelines in the last week for police on the safe use of the internet which advises officers against sharing “operational material” online.

PC Peach declined to comment as anything he might say could later be used as evidence against him!

Situation Vacant

Pope resignsA unique opportunity has unexpectedly arisen with our client in Rome.  The ideal candidate will be of previous good character with excellent communication skills.  Fluency in several languages is also desirable, while the successful candidate will also enjoy occasional overseas travel and the adulation of millions wherever they go.

Whilst no specific qualifications have been requested, it would help if you hold strong views on subjects such as euthanasia, abortion and the use of artificial birth  control.

You should be available to start this new role with effect from 1st March 2013 and must look good in long, flowing white robes and a skullcap.  On occasions you may also be required to wear a bullet proof vest!

Applications are being taken by the incumbent via their official Twitter page @Pontifex.

Totally topical!

Just had to share this – Mac on gay marriage and Huhne’s downfall!!!

"... and will you promise to love, honour and take on any penalty points if I'm caught speeding?"

“… and will you promise to love, honour and take on any penalty points if I’m caught speeding?”

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